I hate fighting slimes.
Always have. Everyone else has a fairly decent tool to fend off those sentient blobs. Slashing and hacking at them eventually scares them off, and they scurry off even faster when a mace or some other blunt weapon blasts them into fifty shambling drops across the field. Magic users have it even easier, as even the weakest elemental spells will blow them away, if not outright kill them. The richest marksmen have crossbows and firearms that shoot ridiculously fast projectiles that just carry a bunch of residue with them, as they tear through a wriggling and clueless mass.
Me? I got a bow. Sure, if I have the element of surprise, I can tear right through one or two of them before they get 'wise.' But arrows are just slow enough for a slime to slip and reform itself out of the way of the arrows. Don't know how they have such badass reflexes with no brains... Of course, most people would remark on how they're hardly even worth the weaponry, and you can just crush them under your boot or smash them apart with one good kick. And I often remind them that they tend to have a pretty good height or weight advantage against them. Slimes don't tend to grow much bigger than 3 feet on their own, and often weigh the same as a few well-packed bags of potatoes, so any human or elf or dwarf or what-fucking-ever could make short work of a more courageous slime.
I, however, am a fucking halfling, and happen to share those last three traits in common with slimes.
There aren't exactly a lot of people who share this sentiment with me, if you can imagine. Sure, a lot of the taller races aren't fond of slimes because they muck up their clothing, or their weapons end up having a gooey sheen for a couple days or so, or they smell weird after getting singed with a firebolt, but they don't try coming up with a path that avoids them over other threats, like wolves. I - and every halfling rogue or marksman I've run across - would rather take the wolves, but I'm never partied up with the Anklebiter Assembly, so I'm always the only person requesting we brave the wolves over traversing along a slime-infested riverbed. And of course, if I do the one smart thing for me in the situation and chill in the back row, the bastards I'm travelling with always call me out! What am I supposed to do? Lob all of my arrows at the floppy bitches and pray they let me hit them once or twice!?
Of course, at least I have someone watching my back in those cases. The worst times I've had to deal with them are when I'm all by my lonesome.
It's my own damn fault I was on my own this time; I had spent the last few nights hopping from tavern to tavern, trying to nab a spot in any halfway-handsome man's bed. No luck on the first three nights, and then finally, when I do get a burly half-orc to sleep with me, the asshole makes away with the rest of my money before I'm even awake! He didn't really take much else, thank god, but one night of rough fucking and two loads of thick, virile cum coating my insides is not fucking worth 75 of my hard-earned silver pieces! If I had paid any attention, and maybe got a bit less comfortable with his fat cock rubbing my sore ass as he spooned me, I would have woken up before him and scurried out with all my earnings still intact... Instead, I'm out in the woods on my own, hunting game and a few rogue wolves that were causing the nearby villages some trouble, just to fill my wallet back up.
The first wolf and its pelt bought me the trust of a spindly old farmer, who lent me his cart to carry my next haul: some coneys and a deer that found their way to the butcher's table, and two silver pieces that found their way into my purse. It was a decent start. If the farmer doesn't throw a fit, I could get away with a few more deliveries, and the coin I get from those will fund my personal expenses on my next joint adventure! That's what I told myself, up until I pulled the cart up to a pond for a break. I scanned the coast thoroughly, or I assume I did. Pond was maybe 100 yards across, host to a few families of fish, connected to the river flowing from the mountains to the northwest and the brook that flowed through the center of town back to the east. And not a single drop of slime residue to be seen for at least 20 yards around me!
I found a seat beneath a young oak tree, and scavenged through my bag. The cook offered me some spare bread after hearing what I went through, which was nice. One bite into the hard loaf convinced me the gesture wasn't just about being nice, though I guess a meal's a meal. The shade was a nice retreat from the heat of the sun above, so it was easy to let myself relax beneath the tree. I chomped and chewed my way through the loaf, idly watching the clouds float by, as I concocted a strategy to fill my purse back up. There was a familiar face or two at the tavern; if they haven't set off already, I could try and tag along with one of those groups once I have enough for a week's worth of inn stays. By that point, any half-decent quest would pay for itself, right? I'd have enough to restock my arrows and pay for a good few more adventures, and soon enough I'd be back up to 75 silver or more! All it would take is maybe a month or two of hard work, and I'd be back on my feet!
A sudden squelching sound came from in front of me, and I was back on my feet in an instant.
"Shit, what the fuck--!" I cursed under my breath as I dashed for my bow and the cart. Fuck this. Absolutely fucking not. If that was a slime, I have no goddamn time for it. I didn't even bother looking back until I had the cart hoisted up. I should not have looked. "What the fuck...!?"
The mass shambling onto dry ground didn't take the same shape as any other slime I've had to witness. This one didn't see to know what shape it wanted, as it forced itself forward in a violent mess of green-ish translucent goop. I don't know if it was fear or bewilderment that froze me in place, but I was bolted to the ground, just watching it make its way to me as it began to form feet, and then legs that extended up from those feet, then a groin, and a chest, and arms... When I could see the head form, my feet found their way off the ground again, only for my ass to meet it instead. This slime found a shape at last, and it looked eerily close to my own!
I was panicking; I must have been, because what other idiot would bother pulling out a bow on a slime that was only a few feet in front of them? And what idiot would bother screaming at it: "Don't move another step, freak, or I'll blow you to pieces!" Why bother, right? It must have done something for it, though, because it stood in place in front of me. It tilted its head. I kept the arrow trained on its chest; probably the smartest thing I did in the moment, since it didn't have a brain in its head. It looked at the bow, or at least I have to assume it did, because the next thing it did was look at its own left hand and shoot out two ropes of slime out of it. They slithered and flailed before finding their shape: a drawn bow the same size as my own, complete with an arrow at the ready. I relaxed my draw, struck with awe, letting the arrowhead rest on the ground. Its own bow shifted to match my own bow's new form.
There was silence between us. I opened my mouth to try and speak, but couldn't find any words. My mouth just rested ajar as my eyes darted around, searching for anything to say. When they returned to the slime, it seemed to have pushed down its jaw and formed a maw of its own, opened slightly. I shut my mouth and prayed it would follow suit. It did. Oh, thank so many gods, it did. But the strange blobby mirror decided to continue its psychological torture in other ways, as it closed the distance between its face and mine. It seemed to scan over my face more and more, and right before my eyes, it fixed itself to match. The featureless visage began to define itself with eyes, a nose, lips, ears, even forming a facsimile of my hair and stubble. The strange teal face that presented before me was now eerily similar to my own. It was more pleasant on the eyes now, at least... It slipped down and fiddled with my coat and other gear, beginning to morph its silhouette of my outfit into a detailed copy.
My voice finally found me, but I almost wish it didn't. "Um... hey...?" I stammered, but with the first noise, its face shot up to meet mine again. "So I'm not exactly sure what party tricks you're planning on pulling past this point, but I'm a bit busy, so maybe you can just save it for someone el--"
It caught me as my mouth was open, shooting its arm inside. My screams were muffled by the invading gelatin, as it shifted itself to match the forms and shapes inside my mouth and sunk deeper down my throat. I was certain it would drown me if it kept going, but it stopped short. It wriggled and flexed against my windpipe, searching for something. I was desperately hoping it would find whatever it wanted, as tears welled up and my gag reflex kicked in. Just as I feared it was trying to suffocate me, though, it retreated, leaving me coughing and sputtering. It didn't leave behind a drop of itself in my throat, thankfully, so collecting myself only took a moment. "Don't-- don't fucking do that again...!"
I looked back at it to find its neck flailing and shifting in a horrible display. Its mouth followed suit, and eventually, its lips parted, offering a horrid revelation in a watery facsimile of my own voice, with just two small sounds escaping it: "Um... Hey...?"
My legs found their strength, and I bounded back. I didn't waste a moment in escaping, but neither did it in capturing me, bounding off its feet and splashing down onto my limbs, pinning me with my back to the ground. I didn't have the strength to push it off me; it was over. I winced and waited for my fate to befall me. That fate never found me, whatever it was, and I looked up to see the slimy copycat staring down at me. It opened its mouth again, parroting me once more: "Hey... Don't fucking do that again...?"
It was strange having it voice its disapproval in my own voice. More intriguing was how fast it was learning. It was such a short interaction, but it was already understanding the common language. Perhaps if I taught it enough in a short span, I could convince it to let me go...? "You're uh... You're pretty smart, buddy, for not having a brain in your head..."
It eyed me curiously. "Brain...?"
I shut my mouth. Given what it did to figure out speech, I should've known that was the absolute worst thing I could say in the moment, and yet I fucking said it. It waited for my answer, but I gave it nothing. It searched me over, fiddling and poking at my clothes and my body, trying to find its answer. "Brain? Brain...? Brain?" I was tempted to laugh when it chose to cup my package, but then it chose to poke my forehead right after. "Brain...?" I restrained every natural impulse I could, refusing to give it a hint.
That's when its finger slipped into my ear canal curiously. "Brain...?" The cold, wet touch left me shivering in surprise, but worse yet, I realized what came next. Even if I didn't hint at it, it found its target, or at least a path to it.
I grimaced, but relaxed myself. If I was lucky, it would be quick. If not, maybe it would feel good along the way..? "Just... be gentle, okay...?"
It nodded, but the force that followed didn't convince me that it understood. Fluid shot into my head through my ear with a sharp pain, slipping past all the defenses of my skull. I shrieked from the pain, but just once. As it entered my head, the pain seemed to cease. Its invasion didn't hurt for any longer than an instant, but I couldn't feel relief. The idea of relief didn't come. My eyelid twitched. Gasps and moans spilled idly from my lips. I lied there as it sank its shifting arm inside my head, my muscles flexing and extending on their own, in response to something beyond my control. My jaw was slacked, my vision fixed and unfocused. What little I could register was blurred, but I could see light flicker and shift inside its translucent head, transforming within itself. Memories flashed in my mind with no reason, knowledge resurfacing without a purpose, but not a thought that came to the forefront was mine to make. Drool seeped from the corners of my lips. My eyes began to roll up into my head. I could narrowly see that the light in its head stopped shifting around so much, but it did not leave my skull.
My eyes pulled back down, not of my own will. I met the eyes of the impostor before me. With a bit more awareness, I might've been able to see the glimmer of thought behind its eyes, but that would prove redundant once it spoke: "Oh, so that's why you were so uncomfortable with me a little bit ago~!" I couldn't respond. I hadn't the sense to respond. It hardly needed a response, though. As it continued its invasion, it formed a smirk on its face, one that grew as it dug deeper into the folds and cracks of my mind. "Wow, there's a lot inside this head of yours! I think I'm understanding more about you than even you know about yourself! Things that gross you out, things you hate, things you enjoy, things that..." It brought its face closer to me. "... Excite you..?" It giggled, before it seemed to grip something specific. "But how about you tell me a bit more about yourself, anyway? I wanna hear what you've got against slimes like me; what makes you hate running into us?"
My lips formed the words on their own: "Sl-- Slimes are dumb... feral magical creatures... Their only instinct is to- t- to attack people and run away... I w-wouldn't even mind them so much if they- they fucked me or something afterward... But they're just nuisances without a brain or any purpose... They o-only exist to pester people... And I can't do anything to s-stop them..."
That answer seemed to please the slime, if its chuckle was any indication. "No brain? What, you mean like that sack of fat in your head? We're so beneath you because we don't have one of these?" It shoved its finger against and into its head, liquid squishing into itself. "Well, I made one of these in just a couple minutes! How long did it take you to put yours together? Twenty years or more, right? I took a few minutes to get done what took you a few decades, and I'm the dumb, feral creature?" I was just aware enough to know what it was doing, but had no way of stopping it. Not that it was being very subtle about its intentions, if the squishing of its crotch against my strained bulge was any indication. "What's so great about yours, anyway? You don't even have control over this stupid thing, do you? And you filled it up with all these fantasies and desires to be subjugated and used? Where's the confidence? The dominance? The assertion? This thing seems kinda worthless, if you ask me~!"
"Y-yes master... My brain sucks... I don't even know how to use it right..." It knew better. We both knew that it knew better. I couldn't exactly shape and morph my brain to work the way I wanted it to, not how it could. It just wanted to tease and humiliate me in all the ways it knew would get me off the most.
"Well, maybe you should stop trying to use it," it suggested. "Look how well I'm using it right now: I'm getting that dick of yours hard as it's ever been, filling your head with more pleasure than you've gotten with all those satyrs and orcs and centaurs you've rode-- How the hell did you manage to ride a centaur, by the way...? No way that ass is supposed to be that flexible..!"
"I know, right? That cock should've killed me!" I wasn't actually sure if that was my own response, or if the slime imitated my sense of humour too. That made finding the source of the next words all the more puzzling. "Yeah, you should use my brain for me..."
"Oh, me?" It decided to get a bit more dramatic in its antics. "I couldn't possibly do that! I'm just a lowly little slime, aren't I?" It emphasized each word with a thrust against my crotch, forcing me to moan in time. "I can't go around taking over people's minds and bodies! No, nonono, I've got a better idea; one that you might find is a bit more 'mutually beneficial,' if you can figure out what that means with that chunk of meat in your skull~!" Its grip inside my head flexed in a weird spot, and an explosion of pleasure radiated through my body. Each squeeze shot another burst of the same sensation, pulsating hardest in my loins, begging for release. "Feel how easy it is for me to bring you right to the edge? You wanna cum so bad, don't you?"
"Yes master..." It didn't prompt that out of me. I wanted to cum. I wasn't even aware of how much control I had gained back, but I was flustered and grinding my hips into its crotch.
"And you like me taking the reins like this?"
"Yes master..."
"You want me to stay inside your head like this, don't you?"
"Yes master..."
"You uh..." It chuckled. "You really like calling me 'master,' huh?"
I could feel the goofy grin spreading on my face. "Yes master~"
"Well, I can't just stay straddled on top of you like this for the rest of your life, can I?" To my chagrin, it had a point. That's when I could feel its liquid arm slipping out of the same ear it entered. There was a hint of fear it would pull out my brain with it, and a hint of disappointment that it was finished playing with my mind. It stood up, and reached out its now solid hand - or at least, it was more solid than a moment ago. I grabbed hold, and let it hoist me back to my feet. It gave me a smile, as it spoke, "So let me show you what I've got in mind for you~!"
My hands reached my pants and pulled them down, to my shock. "Wait, what--!?" I had my hands pulling down my underwear, revealing my twitching rod to my master. My hips moved on their own, thrusting into its crotch, submerging my cock as deep as I could get it into its green, gooey body. I only had a moment to realize it was still taking control of me, when I felt the flexing in my brain harder than before. My mind exploded into a white-hot pleasure, shooting out the end of my shaft into its body. I couldn't help but shout in ecstasy, probably loud enough that I could be heard back in the village. My gaze stayed pointed at my throbbing meat, watching as my balls emptied out inside my master. Spurts of cum shot inside of it, collecting together, before diluting and combining with the rest of the fluid of its form. I could hear its sighs of contentment in my own voice.
"That was awesome~!" It sent the command to my mind, and I pulled myself out of it, my cock cleaner and drier than I would've expected before today. "And most of you people-types shoot cum like that, right? That tastes divine!"
I stayed in place for just a moment, before reaching for the beltline of my pants. "So... I guess I'm just your thrall now, or your mindslave, or whatever, huh? What are you planning on doing with me long-term...?" Now that my arousal had died down, the implications started creeping upon me. The shapeshifting slime before me just guffawed at the remark.
"Oh yeah, I'm gonna start taking over the world, obviously, starting with getting you to help me enslave that pitiful village you're hanging around!" It kept laughing, patting my shoulder. "No, no, I don't give a shit about that kinda garbage! I literally just gained sentience within the last hour; I'm gonna enjoy it with my new boytoy, and see if I can put together a nice collection of guys like you later down the line!" So it only seemed to be interested in sex so far. That was a relief for me. The thought was still itching at the back of my mind, but only for a moment longer before it just vanished. "So here's how the rest of the deal works: I decide when you get to cum, and get some real estate on your thoughts and knowledge. What you get is this little film of my slime covering your brain," it made a swirling gesture with its finger over my forehead, "and what that's gonna do is cover your brain just enough that I can remote control you whenever I want, while still letting you think of your own accord and maintain full control of your body the rest of the time. So you get to have your little fantasy of being a brain slave to some magical creature type and maintain some sense of autonomy!"
"That's... great and all, but..." I was concerned about where the line between my thoughts and its thoughts existed, if I would be able to still tell which was which, or if it's already irreversibly altered my mind to follow its will, and it only seems like I've agreed to it. Suddenly, though, the concern disappeared. It was kind of a stupid thing to think about in the first place. Did it really matter whose thoughts were on the forefront, when its brain is basically the same as mine? I shook my head. "No, nevermind, I'm cool with that."
There was definitely a change in how I thought, though. Specifically in how I thought about slimes. My adventures did finally pick up, not taking me too far from that village, but I swear that half of those expeditions were just slime magnets. Whenever we passed through slime-infested bodies of water, I couldn't bring myself to attack those slimes at all. My hand just wouldn't reach my bowstring. How could I, knowing the potential they had? They didn't deserve to be beaten down so ruthlessly. Of course, I was stuck just watching my fellows drop and run away as the brutish adventurers came at them with such violence in their hearts. Sabotaging their wanton destruction would turn their gaze on me, and god knows I share too much in common with those squiggling pals to survive that. Convincing them to reroute was no easier now than before. All I could do was witness their plight from afar, much as I did before.
I hate fighting slimes.